Musings

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Marty Memories

The overwhelming thing I remember about Marty is the phrase, "Saddle Up". He would announce this when he was ready to go home after a visit. What it meant was: kids stop what you are doing and get ready to go, Paulette get the coats on the kids, Paulette get the baby ready to go, Paulette start saying goodbye to everybody. He did not personally get involved in the "Saddle Up", he was the alpha male, drill Sargent who must be obeyed. I still have a memory of Paulette putting coats on Kathy and Karl all the while the kids not taking their eyes off Marty. Up to then they had been playing nicely with their cousins but this moment was serious. Marty is a very good card player and he liked to win, especially when it was for money. (Very small stakes.) I do not remember which games we played, maybe Pinochle or Foine, but he did not miss a chance to win. For the rest of us they were only games, but Marty, even in joking humor, was serious about winning. He surprised us all one night when he angrily accused Paulette of playing the wrong card and costing him 30 cents. His humor was very funny and usually dry, he did not laugh loud himself but had a wide grin when he saw that someone got the joke. He never told a joke on himself, it was always at someone else's expense. His face lit up when he understood the meaning of a story and others did not get it completely. He competed in everything. He wanted to be a writer like his sister and took a writing course at Wayne State University. He showed me a piece he had written in which he received an A. The teacher had added a comment that it was similar to Beckett's "Waiting for Godot." The submission was original writing from Marty and he took that as a good compliment. Some of the themes covered in his piece were: God, experience, pain, truth, eternity (may be a weak recollection on this) despair and futility. Quite a bit for a young writer. If Marty and Paulette had different opinions it was Marty's that won out. I recall a disagreement about getting an expensive car repair, though I don't know which side claimed what, but they did it Marty's way. He always had an eye for a trim female figure. When we four attended a Ford Detailer's party, held in a basement, the hostess whispered to Pat: "Watch Marty when I walk across the room, his eyes are going to be on my ass." Pat was laughing as she told me that it did happen. This woman had only known Marty for 30 minutes and had him figured out. Getting a check from the government every month, Marty once told me, was his supreme goal. He did not want to work for it like everyone else. Now Marty was not without skills, I witnessed him in action when he was managing a store. Most impressive was his skill at deciding what should be done when somebody came to him with a problem. He multi-tasked with confidence and intelligence and seemed to know all the functions of the store. I would have hired him if I had a store. I know there are other things but I have suddenly run dry, enough for now.

12 Comments:

  • Wish I could remember some nice things.

    Pat

    By Blogger patb, at 7:15 AM  

  • Did something happen to my dad and this is your way of breaking it to me gently?

    I certainly remember "saddle-up." He said it at home when it was time to go anywhere too, with that booming voice that you could hear around the whole block. I may have a selective memory but I don't remember it being so serious. Of course, we did it, but it didn't seem to be a threat.

    I certainly don't remember any male ever helping kids with coats, etc. in that day and age. I am so glad times have changed.

    I have womderful memories of daddy singing some very deep Johnny Cash songs. "Another day older and a'deeper in debt..." To this day, I love a deep male singing voice.

    His humor is still something to behold and he certainly has learned to turn the joke on himself if necessary (probably because there is so much to make fun of). The rule is to go for the funny.

    My mother said anything negative about my dad. I am sure she could have, but she chose not to and I am grateful. We knew the negatives, but he was still our dad and we loved him.

    At a get together at my house a number of years ago (pre-Jackson) mom and dad were both there, playing cards and reminiscing about the "old days." One of my friends said "your parents are so sweet" and she was very surprised that they had been divorced so long and got along so well together.

    By Blogger EZ Travel, at 5:14 PM  

  • Sorry, that sould say "My mother never said anything negative about my dad."

    I didn't take the time to proof, I just kept typing.

    By Blogger EZ Travel, at 5:16 PM  

  • You don't know your Uncle Marcel too well, he helped get our kids ready to depart, even started up the cold car so it would be warm when we went out.
    Do you remember your father leaving your mother alone with all of you kids? Very traumatic. Do you remember her being in a psychiatric hospital after he left?

    All under the bridge now.

    Keep the memories you have, but you were too young to see things at that time.

    By Blogger patb, at 12:44 PM  

  • Don't worry I saw plenty, I was young, not blind. Those memories are part of my life.

    My mother obviously believed in, and passed on to us (even the atheists among us), the importance of forgiveness and letting things go.

    Not to mention the importance of personal responsibility. My father was responsible for leaving but not for mom's actions after that. Anything she did, she chose to do. Then she knew she needed help and she got help. She got strong and she had a wonderful life (and some pretty amazing kids). Was it hard? You betcha. I hate that she had such a hard life, but I love who she was and who she made me. Could she have done that if daddy had stayed? No.

    Thanks, Daddy.

    By Blogger EZ Travel, at 5:58 PM  

  • No Thanks to your Dad, thank her family that helped her through all of this. She was loved by all of us, and the hurt she felt, we felt too.

    She did wonders in her life, and her attitude was great. She was a worker and a true Beauregard.

    Thank you Grandma and Grandpa Beauregard

    By Blogger patb, at 7:35 AM  

  • Oh yes, my memory has now been jogged. When Paulette was in the psychiatric hospital they would only release her to a member of the family. Nobody in Detroit was in a position to care for her. Pat was living in Miami and said she would take Paulette. Paulette arrived in deep depression, did not watch television, did not want to do anything. Pat spent time talking to her and holding her all the while encourageing her to get better. Pat was also taking care of her Mother at the time. I was back in Detroit working for Interlock Corp.

    I remember talking to Pat about what we would do if Paulette did not survive this crisis. we decided that we woould take one of the kids and raise it as our own. Our choice was Erika (she was so darn cute) but I can't remember what was decided about the others. Maybe Rita remembers. Anyway, Paulette did recover and indeed became a strong, loving, forgiving person.

    By Blogger Marcel, at 2:01 PM  

  • Good memory Marcel. On a daily basis, it was not easy and at times very discouraging to see litle progress, but it all worked out, and I am so happy I did this for the least of my sisters. Thank you God.

    By Blogger patb, at 2:22 PM  

  • And you said my dad wanted to write fiction!?

    By Blogger Gretchen, at 5:58 PM  

  • This comment has been removed by the author.

    By Blogger Adrienne, at 10:20 PM  

  • I'm tired. I am tired of the way the two of you are maligning my family and my mother's memory. If you "loved" and cared for her so much, then you would respect her memory and take this time to shut the hell up and quit speaking ill of the choices she made in her life.

    I am curious Marcel,as to your reasoning to write such a post in the first place. Will you be maligning Uncle's Jim and Bob as well? For that matter, is it time for one of us to speak our true feelings about your choice of a spouse?

    Shall we speak about the racism, the bigotry, the ability for you to disown your own flesh and blood over something as silly and ridiculous as religion?

    Is this where we air ALL our dirty laundry?

    I know, I stated in my blog, that it was my space to say what I feel and I afford you that same space on yours, but I truly am curious as to what your motives are.

    As for your comments, Aunt Pat, I gave up caring a while ago. You have never known the real me and you never will. But let me give you a little tiny peak inside. Thanks to my wonderful mother, I am a strong opinionated woman who cares deeply for her family and will stand up to anyone and everyone for them.

    You think a momma bear can be tough? Don't mess with a baby bear either.

    Please don't try to pass this off with the "you were too young" line on me, yes I was young, but that was an important time in our lives and I have vivid memories of the good the bad and the ugly.

    By Blogger Adrienne, at 5:31 AM  

  • Adrienne,
    I wrote about my "Marty Memories" after I found out that Marty, as ZA, was looking in and commenting about some blogs. That he shuld do so pleased me, and I am interested in his view. That's it, no more no less. Marty is a book that I picked up and did not finish reading. Did his card skills get better? or worse? How did his writing go?

    Erika wrote that, later on, your parents got along well, can't I also get along well?

    Please remember, your uncle does not write in animus or to cause anguish. He only wishes the best for all of you.

    By Blogger Marcel, at 1:42 PM  

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