Teach To Love
During this morning's homily, the Priest said something that caught my ear like it was being bitten off. He was referring to some counselling that he was doing with an elderly man. He told the man that he had to teach his children to love. Teach to love, What!! He further stated that loving was not natural to humans. Since it is not natural then it must be taught. Wow, I quickly determined that I had never sat down to teach any of my children to love. Did I fail someplace?
Teaching to hate I understood, the song from the movie: "You've Got To Be Taught To Hate" comes to mind. Also the recent clips of Palestinian children going through exercises to hate Jews, even to the desire to blow themselves up to kill Jews. Teaching to hate is clear to me. I am also seeing that some American mothers are teaching their children to hate strangers, out of a fear that strangers will do them harm. Teaching to love, now this is worthy of some thought.
There was another line from the homily that came as a shock: "While Jesus requires us to love one another, it does not mean we have to like them." Not like them? In my uncritical thinking, I thought we liked a person and then escalated to loving them. I guess that is for people who become very close to us. Now loving people and not liking them, what would be an example of that? Again, something worthy of some thought.
It has been a few hours since returning from Church and I am obsessed with these two lines. I don't know why.
posted by Marcel at
10:02 AM
6 Comments:
Maybe in order to find out why you are obsessing about this, get some counceling from the priest. I'm sure he would love to help you.
He has helped me several times. He's a nice guy.
Pat
By
Anonymous, at 3:41 PM
Also, I always thought I taught our children to love one another and others, I hope I haven't failed.
By
Anonymous, at 3:43 PM
Yes, we were taught to love. We were not overtly taught (there was no lesson plan on how to do it; no homework) but we were taught by example. So surely you did not fail.
"Hate" is a bad word in our house (as is stupid). That is just not a allowable thing to feel towards people. At least, until you are old enough to understand just how powerful it really is.
The stranger thing is interesting to me though. We have not had the "stranger danger" talk with Jackson, but mostly because he is naturally wary of strangers. Unlike, Megan at this age (and younger) who would talk to anyone and everyone. So Gretchen had to make sure that she understood what to do if someone approached her. I don't think of this as "teaching her to hate" strangers, but to be cautious. But, I can see that it could get out of hand and end up that way if not handled appropriately.
I certainly understand the like/love dichotomy. I remember Gretchen's kids being told you don't have to like your sister (since that was a seemingly impossible thing to do) but you are required to love her. That made absolute and perfect sense to me.
By
EZ Travel, at 4:44 PM
That line about not being born to love goes totally against everything I was taught in Catholic schools. Love is universal, innate. Hopefully the priest is talking about expressing love, and not the ultimate definition of love.
I, too, am familiar with the "love and not like" line. It has always made sense to me. Even though we don't always agree on everything every time, we have, deep-down, a built in sense of love for every human being with whom we come into contact. That is a very powerful lesson, and it's great that you are re-evaluating it. All of us need to look at that again every once in a while.
By
Sean M., at 9:31 PM
I completely understand the learn to love, you learn by example. When babies are born we instictively love them just because they are. They however learn to love us, through being loved and loving us they learn to love others around them. It's like talking, babies don't just know how to talk, they repeat what they hear.
As for the difference between liking and loving, love is an emotion, like is a judgement. An opinion. I have found that contrary to popular opinion, I am often not entitled to my own opinion. When it comes to those I love, I have learned that I don't need to like or dislike everything about them, I can just accept them for exactly who they are. Freeing myself from the "need" to have an opinion has allowed me to love simply for the joy that loving gives me.
By
Gretchen, at 6:05 PM
I believe we are taught to love only through the love God has shown for us through his Son. He sent his one and only child to be sacrificed for our sins, so that we are blameless and can live with Him in paradise eternally. WOW! When we understand that love, we pass it along to our children and others through our words and actions. In this way we teach our children to love others also because of the love Christ has for them.
By
Tarren Prange, at 7:41 PM
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